Aug 25 2013

All our tomorrows…

Posted by Knonie

All our tomorrows... ©knonie


Feb 6 2013

Khud-kalami

Posted by Knonie

“Aisi duniya mein jahan har larka kisi aur larki kay liye mujhay chhor sakta hai tou kia yahan aik bhi aisi larki nahi hai jo meray liye qurbani day sakay?”

“Koun larka? Koun larki? Kia duniya?”

“Yehi duniya jis mein hum nay inqalab lana hai.”

“Haan, tou duniya badli tou nahi hai?”

“Badli tou hai. Aur kia ab sab kuch he aik illusion hai?”

“Haha nahi. Ye duniya soch ki nahi, haqeeqat ki he hai. Insaan buhut badal gaya hai, kehnay ko, kiyoon k ab ilm buhut waseeh ho chuka hai aur insani zehen bhi, laikin jhagray wohi puranay hain. Bas kuch pesa kamanay ka dhang karo aur phir kuch bachay day kar chalay jao. Lo jee tumharay jesay aur aa gaye.”

“Haan ye tou insani zindagi kay baqa kay liye hai.”

“Jesay ye sab kuch tou aik aam shakhs insani zindagi ki baqa k liye karta hai. Pata hai jo iss baqa k naam pay ho raha hai…”

“Ab baat ko kaheen aur mutt lay kar jao…”

“Acha bakwas na karo. Meri baat suntay tou ho nahi wesay he poochtay ho bas. Pata nahi meri baton mein doobnay ka kia ishq hai tumhain. Jis din doobnay na doon, uss din mujhay bardasht bhi nahi kar saktay.”

“Ab ye baat kahan say nikali hai. Main ja raha hoon.”

“Dafa ho apnay ghar. Tumharay ghar walay pareshan ho rahay hon gay kay kaheen raat na ho jaaye.”

“Fuck you! Wo mera ghar nahi hai. Aur is haftay sham ko jaldi aaoon ga aur baton k liye poori raat bhi ho gi…”

“Oye hoye… Zindagi…”

“Acha bye!”

“Bye!”


Jan 9 2013

Not a Suicide Note…

Posted by Knonie

They are making a fool out of you.

They can sense your strength, they can feel your uniqueness, and that is what keeps them restless.

No matter how busy they are, they have time for you, because you are still not like everyone else.

They take you as an alien or a rebel, so they disapprove you altogether. Some are kind, so they tend to make you feel understood. They will hardly change their own principles, but make you change yours. They will change your glasses so that you could see the world the way they want.

They will make you suffer for the unseen things. They will live their life in a way that will give you a constant sense of guilt. Yes, you are responsible for their hurt and tears, this is what they want you to think. They will keep on giving you some small amounts of sympathies to make you feel protected, and pleasures to keep you curious, but will spend the greater time to make you feel sad and tired… Or precisely “Tied”.

They will make you live under certain patterns, and make you believe that it is the only way. They will put conditions that take your freedom. They will bound you to the promises of a better tomorrow for which you will be held responsible. They will do anything to make you suffer during the time when your life has the greatest amount of passion and zeal. They will distract you from all the places till you feel your passions are worthless. They will take the worth out of everything… every little thing that was once a source of joy for you.

They are making a fool out of you. Yes, all of them.

Don’t let anyone kill you.

Be careful.


Jan 6 2013

I am present…

Posted by Knonie

I am present
in the past
of everyone
I loved.

— Knonie.

20130106-233319.jpg


Jan 4 2013

Do you love me?

Posted by Knonie

Do you love me
Or hate seeing me
without you?

— Knonie.
20130104-034834.jpg


Dec 9 2012

My Phobias and other annoying things…!!!

Posted by Knonie

My Phobias… Hey, I don’t even know what this term actually means in Psychology…

As a human being, I too have many. The thing is that I realized many of them and controlled them a lot. That’s the most interesting part…

According to my rules, there are two solutions of overcoming your fears:

  1. Avoid that thing, if possible.
  2. Try to learn to live with it, steadily.

Insects:

Those legged creatures are too annoying, especially when they crawl on your body. I used to fear them a lot when I was a kid. But gradually, I have changed my habits (perception). And now I take these things so ordinary that still I like to catch insects, bugs in my hands. These include Ladybirds, Mantis, Grasshoppers, Crickets, Ants, butterflies and moths, spiders, bees, wasps… still looking for cockroaches.

Heights:

It’s not that strong fear, but still, I don’t feel comfortable being on the edges of high roofs and looking down. Maybe, it’s a fear of falling. So I don’t usually peep from the roofs.

Certain People:

I don’t feel comfortable sitting in the company of elder people, people having narrow [mental] vision and people wearing Army Uniforms or formal dresses.

Quarrels:

I don’t like being into places where people fight, especially physical beating. Similarly, I don’t like wars, neither watch news of this sort. I think that most of our cases can also be solved peacefully.

Accidents:

I always wish to stay away from any big accident or mishap, fire, drowning, road accident, etc.

Vehicles:

That phobia is somewhat still here. I hate vehicles. I always wish to have those old chariots days, or just bicycles around… but we can’t help it, these fast moving vehicles are a must. Still, I haven’t practiced driving and not intended to. I guess, I’ll do it somehow if I ever try.

Bus…

[Originally written on Aug 25, 2005]



Mar 19 2012

That’s how my old friends define Knonie…

Posted by Knonie

I moved to a different phase when I was admitted to UET Lahore in 1998. There I got a chance to understand so much about life and people. Probably that’s the time when I actually started to realise the fact that I am free. I got some really amazing friends during and after that time. Then internet came along, and most of us got stuck to online UETian Forum and Orkut to discuss various things all the time which helped everyone become more familiar with each other. During all this time, these are some of the friends who took me the way I am, and appreciated me for who I am.  I’m very lucky to have friends like them and I’m sure not everyone gets this privilege to get this much love and respect from his friends. It feels great to see all of them doing great in their lives now. I’m sharing the testimonials they wrote for me some 8 years ago, and see how they looked at me…

Advertise Anywhere, © Knonie

Sherry [Ambarene]:

HE is a kind of person who can make you believe that rainbow has more than seven colours. ‘MAGICIAN’ as I call him, always there whether you need him or not, person with very wild ideas, can talk on anything. HE loves stuff toys, is careless, drinks Mountain Dew, wear Levi’s… aur jab aap insay agree nahi kerain gay tou koi ma’arfat ki aisii baat kerain gay k banda chup hojata hai, kion k akser ko tou samajh nahi aati aur jo samajh jatay hain woh….genius hotay hain 😀

(29 Sept 2004)

Hasan Tanvir:

K-nonie bahi… He is an Artist…. A complete artist… Man who can do anything to please you …. He loves smiles… I have learned a lot from him… and one thing I would like to say about his eyes:) “teri ANKHON kay siwa duniya main rakha kia hai”

and he is very ZIDDI like we all SCORPIONS are… but believe me he cares a lot about his friends, but he is very afraid of EXAMZ… even we all begged him to take the EXAMZ!!! Khair he is human too kia hua jo artist hai to… He believes in his dreams…..and yes there will be a Day insha Allah… when we all [DEW TEAM] will make “DHOOM”… May Allah be with you ….!!! I know He is your best friend……;)

(15 Dec 2004)

Ahmed Faraz:

Knonie! He’s a darling, everyone loves him, and so do I.

He can do anything, he can be anything, he thinks he’s a god. Artist, designer, musician, singer, but not a civil engineer. He lives in his own world of dreams and morals. Highly imaginative and optimistic. He has that conviction and faith which can make “mountains move”, the way he followed his dreams and priorities against all odds is evident of this. Thats why he sometimes seems stubborn but he’s really sweet and helpful.

Nonie loves to socialize, you will always find him surrounded by new and interesting people, he has a big fan following; a celebrity in making 😉 Due to his social life I’ve met very nice people. I’ve known Nonie for a long time, spent time together wandering aimless late nights in university days, discussing philosophy, arts, music, movies.

Nonie has always been a source of inspiration for me.

Caution: Nonie can be highly addictive, take him in small doses.

(27 Jan 2005)

Samerene:

knoodles… as I call him… someone very difficlt to understand but very easy to be with… who is always there to listen… who has veryyyyyyyy different views about everythng… batain buhut mushkil karta hai aur manta bhi nahi k woh mushkil hain… Someone who is not just frnd.

(21 Jun 2005)

Cashif:

AHMED , mostly known as KNONIE… I know him from the last seven and half years. A long time to judge and understand a person. I’ve seen him changing, evolving and propagating…

He is a god of many things, needs no degrees or recognition from any institute as he is an institute himself. People learn from him. I also learnt a lot in our relationship.

He has a quality to attract people. Wherever he goes, a gathering is formed giving him a pivotal status. This is because he knows something about everything.

Long live KNONIE

(28/29 Oct 2005)

Asad:

Ladies & Gentlemen, whoever amongst you haven’t met Knonie yet, you haven’t lived half your life (mercifully!!!).

Knonie bhai is the most unpredictably sweet person I have ever met (equally obnoxious at the same time). We never shared any likes & dislikes. His likes are his own, like K***** & T*****, painting, sketching, web design etc. etc. etc .etc. and yes of course, just being obnoxious, his most noteworthy trait. But still we share a lot, which is, as knonie puts it, the Scorpian Nature.

(29 Oct 2005)

Kashif:

Thought Changer – Life Changer.

(6 Dec 2005)

Ucheee [Usman]:

Ahh… What shall I say now. I’m always degrading his work, always taunting him to make him as ordinary as we are. Always saying bad words about him on his face but still I don’t know why I praise him so much when he is not around. He looks like my elder brother in his appearance but he is a hell much better than him in every aspect. I don’t respect many people but he is the one I respect by my heart :) He thinks he is perfect but he is just a kid, he couldn’t be better than me ;)…You can call him an angel, because he’ll be there for you always, but he doesn’t work for free. Prefers Relationship over everything that’s why he likes those guys who are nicer to him, unlike me :)…

He knows how to talk with his mouth shut and knows how to make someone understand what he wants to say. If you spend your life searching for a Friend like him, that life wouldn’t be a wasted life :)… Words aren’t just enough to describe him. Waisay tou he is a Big Bonga but Artiyaan achi maar laitay hain ;).

I would say that I HATE THIS PERSON more than anything, and I mean it ;)… Hey Buddy stay like this forever, you look good this way… Best wishes for you and your Burhpapa{Future}…God Bless us All :)

(2 Feb 2006)

Fay:

She bites !

(16 Jun 2007)


Mar 14 2012

And the dead beloved writes…

Posted by Knonie

You know, after so many years, when things will become more stable, agreeable and normal, you’ll see that the most amazing moments of your life were spent with me. There are thousands of other things that make you happy but there you see I stand out. Wasn’t I really made for you? Wasn’t I really came into your life because you also needed me in your life?

Faces and Numbers, © Knonie

It may sound strange, but you are the last person I ever loved, and in fact, still only love you while you’re reading this.

You helped me realise who am I, and then everything started to become clear…

Every day you live is a new day for you. You don’t even need to remember me ever. I have so become a part of you.

Someone to understand you the way you are, someone to share your everything. Someone to understand you the way you are and the way you understand them. Someone to laugh and cry with, someone to love and avoid, whenever we want.

When someone doesn’t have anyone to share, anyone to listen, he become lonely, no matter even if he talks all day. Sharing is love. I’m feeling hungry. Hey, share me a chocolate over the internet…


Mar 10 2012

If it’s really you…

Posted by Knonie

In my most private moments and during my sacred rituals, you are there with me. You are there in my happiness, in my pain, in my wishes and in all the things I could think of. You are the one who lulls me to sleep every night, and you are the one who wakes me up every morning.

The closer I’m coming to you, the farther I am leaving everything else behind. I do not need the people and the memories of the past. I was hurt, I had cried and suffered, I have spent sleepless nights and painful days, but still I kept on looking for you in everyone, believing that one day I will find you. The one who understands, the one who feels you and becomes the part of your body and soul.

Like a drop losing its separate existence after mingling with sea, I am beginning to lose the part of my self and ego, and becoming more like a part of your existence.

It is only you… It is only you…
And if it’s really you, then I know you feel it too.

Strawberry rose carving, © Knonie

Strawberry rose carving, © Knonie


Feb 7 2012

Reality doesn’t hurt, it’s the unreal that hurts…

Posted by Knonie

Freedom, Photo © Haby, Knonie

I tried binding others by the chains of what I can now call so-called promises, future dreams, and impracticable but emotional commitments. I somehow believed that this was the way these things should go.  It took some time for me to realise that even if that’s the way things usually go around, this thing won’t work for me. I must do what I ought to do. Having something “Red” in front of my eyes and making myself believe that it is actually my favourite “Blue” is more like a deception. Reality doesn’t hurt, it’s the unreal that hurts, we just need to understand and face it. Everyone has their own limits to love and understand anyone else, then why force anyone to love you the way they cannot understand?

I no longer believe in binding anyone in these kinds of chains. Love gives you Freedom, and Trust defines Freedom. While the unfulfilled promises hurt you and the idealism shatters you, Love keeps you happy and Trust keeps you satisfied. Each moment of your life becomes a wonderful experience…

You are free, like air around me…
This is the Trust I experience with you…


Jun 30 2011

Collection of Orkut Testimonials I have written to my friends in 2004-2006

Posted by Knonie

Dushman har koi--Sajjan koi koi. [So many enemies-- So fewer friends]Back during 2004-2006, I used Orkut, one of the social networking communities, and had a wonderful social networking experience. During that I even come to know many new nice people. Orkut profiles offered a place where friends can write testimonials about you.

Followed here are the testimonials I have written to my friends during that time. Read below and you’ll see how nice friends I have. It also tells a bit about my personality…

AmmO: (2/4/2006)

My Little Sis… My Childhood friend… Bachpan ki dost.

We talk a lot, discuss a lot, and share a lot. Ghar mein sab say ziada mairi issi say tou banti hai. We even use each other’s jackets and tops.

We converse about Books, Music, Movies, Psychology, Philosophy, Government, Culture, Behaviours, Trends, Medical, Science, Arts, Technology, Boys & Girls… and what not!

She’s a nice person… Peaceful at heart… Sensible, Sincere and a bit naively Innocent.

She’s imaginative as well as pragmatic in her approach towards life.

Always wishing her the best of everything!
:-)

Love You!


Shuja Ahmad: (2/10/2006)

Shuja is one of the loveliest people I know.

My little friend…
My Rocky…
My younger brother…
My cute cuddly teddy…

I sometimes complain why God has sent me on Earth so many years earlier, otherwise, we both must be sharing PS2, talking about our favourite wrestling stars, or simply playing with pet doggies. Even having some considerable age difference, he’s a great companion. He shares so many things with me… we discuss about various stuff and enjoy a lot.

We both like Chocolates & Sweets; we both don’t like Pokémon… that’s why, we both are cool!!!

I really love his way of talking… so sweet. His innocent ways and straight-forward style of saying things is another trait I admire. This person really makes me happy. Sometimes he laughs, in fact, laughs out loud at some little joke I crack, and that’s the best part.

And in the end, a prayer that may God always keep you in His special protection, and may you always smile!!!


Fawad Raza: (7/8/2006)

My sweet cousin…

Soft natured, friendly attitude… A loving person.

Being my family member, I know him quite closely. We were good friends when we were young, but now, we are buddies.

This person is full of fun… always having interesting stories to share.

And yes, he’s a music freak. His choice is superb… great classical Rock… Continue reading


Apr 2 2011

Knonie is back to blogging, after a buggy break

Posted by Knonie

After a break of around 2 weeks, I’m finally here… Back here…
Actually when I logged in to my Blog Admin, I found some bug, so I wasn’t able to post any new stuff…

Elizabeth Taylor passed away and I wanted to write about her, and then a few other things came up and I wanted to write it. I should’ve written those documents and should’ve posted them once the blog is working fine, but I was being too lazy…
And today I logged in and everything was working fine…

I wanted to write and express so much these days… I feel so refreshed and mentally charged, as if I need to do some serious work. I have observed that my vision and comprehension is improved… Like I have understood many secrets of this life and other things around… So much to talk about, so much to elaborate, so much to write… Sometimes I think it’s good to write as it transfers the knowledge and builds the intelligence level of the next generations or others, but sometimes even this very things feels like “WHY?” Why should we awake those who are asleep, as everyone wants to live their life their way so let them do it. Everyone cannot understand the Truth…

Anyways, I’ll start writing again, and will try to finish some other projects I’ve been lazily working on since many months…


Mar 10 2011

Let me tell you who you are to me – A Personal Letter

Posted by Knonie

I Love Me - Knonie

When I first communicated with you, it was very comfortable. I felt that this is the person who can understand my thoughts and speak in the same language. Talking about all that idealism and love and mysticism with you, that was too good. And then you wished that conversation never end. I wished the same.

It was good to find someone who has time to talk about the concept of Love, God, Creation, and so much more. A person who has more things to talk about rather than just careers, women and commercial songs. I started believing in everything you said. I never thought they are only words. I found peace and light in your words, and I told you that. It’s correct, as you said, that I also know so many things, but still, I’m not perfect. In your presence I learned many things. I learned that these things are real, the love Rumi talked about is not just words, but that is Real.

Then, you said I’m one of those people who have the key to your heart– I was surprised by this statement. I started feeling myself even closer to you. You asked me to come with you, fly with you, be you, be one… I trusted your words… I fell in love with your inner Self…

Those few days during which we communicated, were the days I remained intoxicated in you…

I’m all full of scars. I told you I’m brokenhearted and I’m fed up of this world full of lies. I told you I’m weak and I want to fly, but my wings are broken. I am a weary and tired traveller, who came to your door for help, because fate sent me to you. I am a bird, who cannot fly because its wings are damaged. You picked me up from your door, told me that I can be all right. You will mend my wings, you will teach me how to fly and you will keep me with you. That made me confident and happy… And then last night you said you are not the person who can help me. Go back to the world who has broken your wings. Go back to the storms that are waiting for you. Survive or die, but I cannot help you because I’m not the one you are looking for. I’m sorry. And after that, you threw me away from your door…

For the first time in my life, I thought I’m closer to the truth…
I still believe it’s not an illusion…
I still love you…
I will always love you…

 


Mar 14 2010

Random thoughts, that can safely be called “Knonieism”

Posted by Knonie

This creative mind has constructed such interesting tales… Still in my memory only. I don’t know if I’d be able to recall that in the morning… I thought what if I write my random thoughts, just to see the variety my thought pattern offers.

Knonie

As a kid, I used to think why some other smaller kids eat soil. I tasted it few times but it never attracted me. Although, I used to love gravels a lot… Shiny and with weird patterns. But fish is a kind of stinky thing, and I still can’t decide if we should call fish an Animal or Food…

I know that the tiny hard tube at the end of Shoelace is called Aglet, but I don’t think it matters much whether you know it or not. Sometimes, humans have enough time to create names for all these things. Everyone uses it, but perhaps no one even knows or say that name. Perhaps Faith is more important than the Title of your Religion.

By the way, raw Fish is an Animal but you can call it Food once it’s cooked.

Today, 14th March [or 3/14 if we write it in the American way], is observed as “Pi Day”. I don’t know if people actually celebrate this day. Today is the birthday of Albert Einstein too. Even if we don’t celebrate his B’day, but he surely changed our lives by his theories. Ant is a very small creature, just like Pi [π]. They help us from the background, but we never realize their importance.

You both are almost identical. Those shiny crystal eyes and such fine dark lashes… Perhaps your brains resemble too. You are growing and changing, as everyone does. And as that Holy Book mentioned and later confirmed by Einstein that the Universe is Expanding, and it is! It’s his Birthday today, by the way…